The Importance of Grief: Understanding, Navigating, and Healing

Hello, it’s Steven here again. Welcome to my cyber-corner. This week, someone close to me experienced the loss of a loved one. (Of course, you can't lose something when you know where it is but you get my point). Watching her go through the painful, complicated process of grief reminded me of how important it is to embrace the natural journey of grief, instead of trying to escape it or push it away. Grief is not something we “get over,” but something we go through—and it’s a crucial part of our healing.

Why We Experience Grief

Grief is the emotional response to loss, whether it’s the death of someone we love, the end of a relationship, a job, or even the loss of a future we had imagined. It is the heart's way of acknowledging that someone (or something) who mattered deeply to us is no longer a part of our earthly or physical lives.

While grief can be profoundly painful, it’s also a testament to the love, joy, and connections we’ve experienced. If we didn’t grieve, it would mean we hadn’t loved or cared deeply enough. So, in a strange way, the depth of our grief reflects the depth of our love and attachment.

Grief is also a necessary part of the healing process. It helps us make sense of the loss and slowly begin to find ways to live with it. Without allowing ourselves to feel and express that grief, healing would be incomplete.

The Stages of Grief: It’s Not Linear

Many people know about the "stages of grief," made famous by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross. However, grief is not a neat, linear process. These stages—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—are more like waves that ebb and flow. You might experience them in a different order or loop back to an earlier stage. That’s completely normal.

What’s important is recognizing that grief will show up in different ways at different times. There’s no right or wrong way to grieve. Some days, you might feel numb or disoriented; other days, the sadness might come crashing in. Some people may find moments of relief or even joy amidst the sorrow, and that’s okay too.

Practical Exercises for Managing Grief

Grief is tough, but there are healthy ways to cope with it and gradually move forward. Here are a few exercises that might help manage the emotional overwhelm of grief:

1. Journaling for Release

Writing down your thoughts, feelings, and memories can be a powerful way to process grief. It allows you to externalize the emotions you’re holding inside. Try starting with a simple prompt like: “Today, I’m feeling…” or “I miss… because…” Let the words flow freely without judgment. This exercise helps you to make sense of the chaos in your mind.

2. Creating a Ritual or Memorial

Sometimes grief can feel overwhelming because the absence of your loved one is so stark. Creating a ritual or memorial can help you honor their memory. Light a candle, plant a tree, or even cook a favorite meal of theirs. This helps you actively acknowledge the loss and gives you space to mourn.

3. Self-Compassion Breaks

Grief can be exhausting, both emotionally and physically. Take moments throughout the day to pause and be kind to yourself. Close your eyes and say, “It’s okay to feel how I’m feeling right now. I’m doing the best I can.” Giving yourself permission to feel without judgment can ease some of the pressure.

4. Grounding Exercises

If grief feels like it’s becoming too much or you’re feeling overwhelmed, grounding exercises can help you reconnect to the present moment. Try the “5-4-3-2-1” method: name five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. This can pull your attention away from the intensity of your emotions and give you a bit of relief.

5. Reach Out for Support

Grief is not something you have to go through alone. Talking with a trusted friend, counselor, or support group can be incredibly comforting. Sometimes just having someone listen without offering solutions can make all the difference. Remember, "being strong" don't mean not to cry but it means knowing it is okay to not be okay because one day, it will be okay.

Moving Through Grief, Not Around It

Grief doesn’t have an expiration date. It doesn’t fit into a neat little box that we can tidy up and put away. It is a part of the human experience—painful but essential. If you are in the throes of grief, please be patient with yourself and allow it to unfold in its own time. And if you’re supporting someone who’s grieving, offer them compassion, understanding, and space to feel.

I hope that these words have helped shed a little light on the importance of grief and how we can cope with it. Grief is never easy, but it’s an invitation to grow, remember, and honor what was lost. And it’s through this process that we find our way back to healing.

Take care, and thank you for reading my blog post.